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Here are my favorite yo' mama jokes - all organized into categories. They're not as popular as they once were but still good for a laugh. Keep in mind, these yo mama jokes are meant for a mature audience and they contain plenty of foul language.

    Yo' Mama's Like.....

  • yo mama’s like a television, even a 2 year old could turn her on!
  • yo mamma's like a video game, three men for a quarter
  • yo mamma's like pizza pizza, thirty minutes or its free!
  • yo mamma's like lettuce, 25 cents per head
  • yo' mama's like a racecar, she burns fifty rubbers a day
  • yo mamma's like like a doornob, everyone tries to screw her!
  •  

    Yo' Mama's So Fat.....
  • whenever she goes swimming in the ocean, baby whales can be seen nursing on her breasts
  • when she wears high heels, she strikes oil!
  • she uses a mattress for a Kotex
  • she makes King Kong look like a baby chimp
  • even Arsenio couldn't kiss all her butt
  • she uses a roll of Bounty and a rope for a tampon
  • she showers at a car wash
  • when your father mounts her, his ears pop
  • she's on both sides of the family!
  • her picture wieghs 10 pounds!
  • her diaphragms come in a Domino's pizza box
  • when she goes to the beach, she's the only one who gets a tan
  • she uses a hula hoop as a pinkie ring
  • if she bent over, they could show two movies on her butt
  • when she dances the band skips
  • I could go bungie jumping with the elastic from her underwear
  • when she wears a red dress, everyone yells, "Hey Kool-Aid!"
  • her clothes have stretch marks
  • her nickname is "eclipse"!
  • she got her own atmosphere
  • when she sites around the house, she REALLY sits around the house
  • Yo' Mama's so Ugly.........
  • yo' father put the bathroom mirror inside the medicine cabinet
  • her pillows cry at night
  • her own shadow is afraid of her
  • even her Rice Krispies won't talk to her
  • she could be a poster child for the burn center
  • when she was a child, her parents sent her to the movies-then moved!
  • when she was a child, she had to "trick or treat" over the telephone
  • she could make k.d. lang go straight
  • she's a living example of why some animals eat their young
  • she's a living example of why you shouldn't do IT with family
  • farmers pay top dollar for her to stand in the fields and scare the crows away
  •  

    Yo' Mama's so Short.........
  • she looks up to EVERYONE
  • she does IT with your sister's Ken doll
  • she could bungee jump off my shoelaces
  • she tried to commit suicide by jumping off a curb
  • she goes swimming in a bottle cap
  • she scuba dives in the fish bowl
  • she has to use a ladder to pick up a dime
  • she takes an elevator to get up to bed
  • she could handglide on a dorito chip
  • you can see her feet on her driver licence picture.
  • she could ride on the back of a roach, and her legs would still dangle
  •  

    Yo' Mama's so Poor........
  • she can't afford to pay attention.
  • I took a peanut and she said don't be so greedy.
  • she has fries on layway at McDonalds.
  • I stepped in her front door and came out through the back.
  •  

    Yo' Mama's so Stupid........
  • she goes to the library to get a book of matches
  • she thinks Boyz to Men is a Day care center
  • she thinks Chevy Chase is a funny car race
  • she brings toilet paper to a crap game
  • she sold her car for gas money
  • she got hit by a parked car!
  • she thinks a quarter back, was a refund!
  • she cooks with Old Spice
  • when you told her it was chilli outside she went and got a bowl
  • she brought a rabbit to a hair salon
  • she thinks Johnny Cash is a pay toilet
  • she took a spoon to the superbowl
  • she water's fake plants.
  • she thinks a pawn shop is a chess players' club
  • she thinks tofu is a guy with a foot fetish
  • she went to a mind reader and was only charged half price
  • she thinks lobotomy is a new dance craze
  • when she went to a movie and it said, "under 17 not admitted,"she went home to find 16 relatives!
  •  

    Yo' Mama's so Old........
  • she remembers the Alamo
  • she knew Ronald McDonald when he was in clown school
  • scientists claim she's the missing link
  • she lived at the Gettysburg address
  • her birthday expired
  • she has an autographed copy of the bible
  • when I told her to act her age, she dropped dead
  • she remembers turning tricks for a nickel
  • she's in Jesus's yearbook!
  • she swam in the Dead Sea when it was still alive.

 

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